, – In a marriage, it is very natural for a married couple to rely on each other. After all, the couple is the closest person who will usually be the first place to complain, complain, and ask for help. However, there are some couples who have very extreme levels of dependence. This condition is called a codependent relationship . Are you one of those people who have a codependent relationship with your partner? Recognize the signs here.
What is a Codependent Relationship ?
Codependent Relationship is a term to describe a relationship where a person needs or depends on another person on a much more extreme level. Couples who have codependent relationships usually have characteristics in which one party will devote his entire life to pleasing the other. The self-confidence and self-worth of people with codependent traits also come from sacrificing themselves for their partners.
According to Lesli Doares, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and author of the Blueprint for a Lasting Marriage , a codependent relationship is an unhealthy relationship, because instead of the two people taking responsibility for their own feelings and actions, one of the partners will take that responsibility for someone else. This makes the self-worth of the codependent party very much determined by his partner, so that he will have difficulty determining who he is without a partner.
A codependent relationship may seem very intimate, but it really isn’t. Karin Anderson, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in relationships, points out that true intimacy should involve two independent, established people who decide to be together, not a partner who needs each other to fill emotional gaps or to have a purpose in life.
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Signs of Codependent Relationship
Think about it, have you sacrificed a lot for the happiness of your partner, but didn’t get the reward you deserved? Maybe you are in a codependent relationship . Here are the signs:
You do things for your partner that he should do on his own
There is a difference between helping your partner and taking care of him like a child. If you take care of almost all of your partner’s needs even to the smallest, such as making sure he gets up and works on time, packs his lunch every day, fills up with gas in his car, and reminds him to do things that he should be able to handle on his own, this means you are already stuck in a codependent relationship .
You are forced to give in to your partner
In any relationship, there are times when you have to compromise . However, that doesn’t mean you have to give in all the time to your partner. Often codependent people do not tell their partner their true thoughts or feelings, for fear that their partner will leave. As a result, codependent people will tend to give in, even though they are actually upset with their partner in their hearts.
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Feeling Worthless Without a Partner
A healthy marriage relationship should involve two people who depend on each other for support and love. However, codependent relationships will feel worthless if they are not needed or do not make great sacrifices for their partner. Codependent people are only happy when they make extreme sacrifices for their partners. Meanwhile, the other party will only get satisfaction when his partner’s needs are met.
Your partner is your world
Healthy partners should also put each other first, but they can also find enjoyment in other things, such as socializing with friends or taking up hobbies. However, codependent partners have no interest or feelings of worth in anywhere other than their partner.
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Codependent relationships are not healthy relationships and can affect mental health over time. If you experience it, don’t hesitate to contact a psychologist via the app . You can contact a psychologist or psychiatrist via Video / Voice Call and Chat anytime and anywhere. Convey complaints and get the best advice from the experts. Download it now on the App Store and Google Play!